Dear moviegoers, find self awareness or STFU November 29, 2009
Posted by therivertakesyou in Film and Media, humor.Tags: Cormac McCarthy, John Hillcoat, Moviegoing, Movies, obnoxious teens, The Road, theater, Viggo Mortensen
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This evening I went to see John Hillcoat’s adaptation of Cormac McCarthy’s The Road, a Pulitzer prize winning novel and an excellent piece of contemporary storytelling. First and foremost, I’ll admit that the first time I read it, I was not impressed. I thought it wad devoid of characterization, overly mysterious and too basic in its narrative construction which made reading about the characters frustrating. Like most books that have remained clearly defined in my mind, I just needed to give it another chance. It’s a great story and its deliberate mystery of character and context is part of why it translates so well to various readers. The characters, an unnamed Boy and his Father, don’t need to say very much to make their motivations transparent and as a result the seemingly mundane and basic elements that make up the story not feel meandering or unnecessary. Besides the point, we’re here to talk about my experience at the movie theater…
I wouldn’t say I’m a purist for film and the theater going experience but I definitely see theaters as the vinyl of our generation: they’ll slide out of their traditional entirely pervasive role in the public’s eye but their influence will never fully leave. I love seeing a movie any time of year whether it be Ninja Assassin at the Magic Johnson Theater on 124th or an obscure Herzog film in Pleasantville’s Jacob Burns Film Center, I just think the act of moviegoing as a communal or personal experience will always be worthwhile. Its for this reason that I want to give a big fuck you to every jackass that comes into a movie with a sense of entitlement and ego big enough to allow you to try, and usually utterly fail, to talk shit about the most arbitrary shit in the middle of the movie. Let me explain.
There are the annoyances of movie watching that we can’t reasonably expect to ever be fully rid of. Things like rustling candy wrappers, the sound of a handfuls of popcorn being scooped out of the bag, or people slurping the last drinks of a soda will never be completely out of the experience because the only reason exhibitors make money is because of those very annoyances in this shitstorm of an economy. The noises suck, I realize this, but just bite the bullet and deal with it so we can all have our Saw XX‘s with despicable acts of violence and endless Twilight movies with tweens staring awkwardly at one another for a third of each film.
Unfortunately, while I was watching The Road, I had the privilege of listening to three snide 18 year olds bitch about everything from the “product placement” to the landscape and set design. And no, they were not doing this quietly, subtley or with any kind of respect for the money everyone else put down to see the film which is only showing in some 100 theaters around the country.You see, The Road is a book and a film that asks you to appreciate the quiet moments as much as the loud ones because each is informative to the other. When you have three dickholes making snarky remarks because a character drinks a can of Coke – an actual moment from the book – or openly wonder how a commercial ship made it onto a freeway – probably had something to do with ya know… the fucking apocalypse?!?! – it becomes pretty fucking tiresome and frustrating to try and follow the quiet performances of the films’ only characters.
"Isn't it amazing that we've figured out all the nuances of the world by 18?!"
My thoughts exactly…
therivertakesyou
